Sad but real and true. I wonder why I'm speaking like a chatter now. Pavlov :(. I started this to get over my discord addiction, and secondly so I can force my thoughts to be more coherent. It's very easy to think of pretty incoherent things due to the great amount of background context in servers. Of course I won't be talking about anything political here, unless you stretch the definition. But let's first talk about the discord addiction.
This latest instance started on the 7th of June it tells me, and for reference today is the 19th. 12 days like that gone, with little memory left behind. I don't remember much usually in general but I feel like this was even worse this past almost fortnight. It is not as simple, however, as forcing myself not to use discord because I will still then have the opportunity to use discord. I did not know this before, so it was quite different. There is pre-discord world and a post-discord world. But I am a rather "flexible" person, and I might come to use a different word, so I still think it is completely possible to move to a non-discord context and become incapable of understanding how I could use such a site, thus removing the opportunity and restoring my environment. But I will not. Maybe because the interim period would be quite uncomfortable. Possibly because of some kind of evolutionary instinct in the competition between methods attached to contexts, and maybe the contexts themselves. However I think the chief reason is simply that I have already experienced that pre-discord life and understood most of it, or at least most of what is possible for me to understand without too much effort. Thus I appreciate the change of scenery at least for the novelty, and am curious about how life is like here. In the worst case this can be taken as an experiment in order to better understand life outside of this context. Thus I have decided not to actively discourage discord usage.
I do expect it to change, though. Addiction might not be the right word. Misuse is closer but I don't know what is "Mis" or "Mal" about it. I wrote this title half as a joke but I guess I have found some truth about this, but whether or not I feel the same way later is a different question. But I won't force myself to think too much about the things I write here, frankly because that's a waste of effort. Because the things I talk about aren't especially important.
My interest in this subject has been satisfied for the most part, so I will end it with saying the reason I believe this happened now, why specifically June 7th was the turning point, was that I then recently graduated high school and thus become fully untethered to all my high school friend(s), and thus untethered to that real life context. So there is no longer any tension between this and discord.