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My ears! I switched to a discord VC and it tripled my volume when I was listening to music. I have deleted that app. I can still access it online unfortunately. My ears still hurt a bit and it gave me a slight headache. Don't really see why I used discord. Am I some kind of narcissist? Well, probably not the medical diagnosis but just narcisstic behaviour. I have come to the conclusion that I'll use neocities instead of gitlab to host this, so I can have a little more freedom while speaking. Unfortunately that does mean latex is off the table, though I think it might've been off the table from the start. Not broken up about it.

I can only speak for myself of course. And I have talked about this before. However people, due to the breakdown of religion and family, now feel a responsibility towards themselves to "feel happy" etc. Normally I would blame myself for exhibiting this but I only do this half way. These kinds of people make better workers and better consumers which is why it's encouraged. I do think it's impossible to find friends on the internet, for me.

I thought I used that internet chatting website for, what's the term... to avoid "loneliness", and certainly that might be true if we were talking about reality but does it really count to me if it's on the internet? Do I really feel not lonely? Is there any reason other than feeling to interact with other people if it's not directly necessary in this day and age? Maybe in reality I only like it because it keeps me stimulated.

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